September 26, 2010
Today was another Sunday, in Iasi Romania! It’s been a bit difficult going to church because I can’t understand what they are saying. I decided in Sacrament meeting to write down every word that I understood in Romanian and English. It helped – I was able to get more out of the talks. I have played the piano in sacrament meeting and in RS the past few times. I feel like it’s my way of giving back or sharing my talents because I can’t communicate with a lot of the branch members. All of the missionaries spoke – Sora Holden, Sora Humphries, Elder Shillabeer, and Elder Johnson. It was so amazing and so powerful to hear them testify of the gospel. Both Elder Johnson and Sister Humphries are leaving on Wednesday and we will get a new sister and a new elder. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be to leave these people you have spent the last few months with and have grown so close to.
We went on a trip to one of the monasteries in the outskirts of Iasi this afternoon. It was a bit far and we had a bit of a hike – it was no Grand Tetons though!
It was absolutely amazing and beautiful. I think the monastery itself is over 500 years old. We went inside and watched people as they prayed to the saints and kissed the pictures. Very different, but interesting. I loved the inside murals and paintings on the walls. It was incredible. We climbed up into one of the belltowers too and took a few pictures.
On the way back, it started to rain. My shoes did not have the greatest traction – infact, no traction at all! I was slipping and sliding everywhere, and at one point, into a thorn bush.
We got back and were covered in mud, but it was completely worth it to have a breathtaking view of Iasi and to see such a beautiful place.
Then, best of all – skyping with the fam. How grateful I am for modern technology and wireless internet!
September 27, 2010
Because Elizabeth and I go to Tomesti together and she wasn’t feeling well today, I braved it by myself today. I was a bit nervous going all the way by myself- even with the bus ride and all, but I thought A) I know where I’m going B) I know the basics of communication C)I have all of the emergency phone numbers with me incase I get into a difficult situation and D) as long as I walk with confidence and always be aware of my surroundings, I will be fine. Indeed I was. Though of course, it was the one day that the security guard who usually checks the tickets stopped and started asking me questions. I noticed that my ticket wasn’t ripped in the corner because the ticket guy had forgotten mine – still I’m not sure what the problem was. I tried to explain I didn’t understand Romanian very well and that I was very sorry, I only spoke English. After trying to understand him and picturing all of the things that could go wrong – he just muttered something, rolled his eyes and left me alone. Thank goodness! I was thinking I would get hauled off to jail or something.
On the other hand, I had about 2 or 3 people speak to me in Romanian on the street. I slightly love it because I feel like maybe I blend in more and could pass as one of them. Example: I am crossing the road and this lady is saying something funny to me, and I have no idea. So, I say “Da, da, da!” and laugh along with her. (Da means yes). I take it as a compliment wihen Romanians approach me and start speaking.
Well, I walked into my orphanage apartment this morning – usually it’s locked up and I have to ring the outside ringer, so they know I am coming. Today, it was open so I just walked in. I figured the kids were in the back, so I was just going to go into the bathroom and change into my scrubs. I turned the corner and one of the workers – who has probably been the most difficult for me was there and I guess I really scared her. Even though I walk in everyday and say “Buna dimineata!” which means goood morning, she hadn’t heard me. I apologized and said I was so sorry. She just smiled and said it was alright. Wow, first time I have ever gotten a smile out of her. That was some serious progress. We had 3 of the 5 boys this morning. The workers wanted to take them to the “park” so we were there all day. It’s hard because there is only so much kids can do in a place like this. I tried to get them to interact with each other more – and it was successful because cute boy R was there today and he is good at helping all of them play together.
I had a very eye opening experience today at the hospital. Our little boy (whom I named Jacob) was moved into a different room by himself. We were playing with him and decided to take him out of the crib and place him on the bed so that we could sit by him and he could layout next to us. We started thinking that he probably should be at a stage where he is crawling atleast. So, we just worked with him to see what he could do – to see if he could hold his head up on his own, pull himself up when we place him on his belly, roll over, stand up and make walking movements, etc.
He could hold his head up on his own, but everything else he couldn’t do. We started working with him on rolling over, sitting up on his own, etc. It was amazing to see how excited he was by just rolling over. After we showed him a few times, he was trying it by himself. His legs are weak and brittle and don’t move like they should probably because he sits in a crib all day on his back. We made leaps and bounds with him today working on his motor development and you could tell it made him so happy.
Well, it was about time to go so we started our “transition” where we begin the leaving process one step at a time. We put him back in the crib, but still stayed where we could touch him and play with him and slowly backed away.
Then – I saw a complete unexpected reaction that made me so sick to my stomach. This was the attachment disorder we had studied about before we came and it was the real thing. He immediately started screaming, rocking himself and going crazy. We tried to calm him down, and it just made it worse. He would arch his back and scream louder. Then, he started self-harm techniques. He would put his hands in his mouth and bite his fingers. At first, Kala and I just tried to calm him down and pulled his hands away gently, until we realized the extent of the situation. At one point, I pulled his hands away and I could see he had bitten his fingers so hard he was bleeding. It was getting more serious than we thought. Kala and I were holding down his hands as he fought and screamed and would bite anything he could get close to his mouth.It was scary to see such a happy little baby take a complete turn to the point that he was harming himself.
This was about the time we were supposed to leave, but we couldn’t take our hands off him because we were trying to hold him as he screamed and fought. And, in the situation that we are in, it is very frustrating for the nurses if we just leave with this screaming out of control baby. Luckily, one of the nurses came in a second later and started feeding him.
She had to go into the next room, so I continued to feed him and he eventually started to calm down. We had to completely wipe him down because he had some blood on his hands, food all over his hands, clothes, face and the pillow. Then, we left slowly so as not to get him riled up again.
It made me so sad to see that today. This is one of the most difficult things about working with these kids in the situation they are in. It seems that the more progress you make, the more difficult it is to leave. Today when we were working with him, we helped him tremendously. I keep hoping that someone will continue to help him develop motor skills and give him that love and that stimulation after we leave because otherwise the neglectful situation he has been in could end up causing him to have problems in the future like severe psychological problems or never having the use of his legs and lower body. Already he has major attachment problems.
It’s difficult when you have workers tell you not to hold or to play with kids, but at the same time you know how important physical touch is. Once you leave and the kids don’t get that affection and love and stimulation you gave them, the problems escalate for the workers. Everyday is a constant battle. Do you leave the baby in the crib and only touch them a little bit and be able to leave? Or do you take the baby out and play and hold it, only to have a major breakdown, accompanied with screaming, self-harming, rocking themselves, etc when you leave? Which is more destructive to the child?
Sometimes it’s difficult seeing these kids thinking that I am going to be a parent one day. It makes me nervous for the challenges I will face as a parent. But, I also am so grateful for the things I have learned through my education as well as from these experiences here in Romania.
Anyways, it was quite a day. I’m sure I’ll have more stories tomorrow.
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