Even though our hospital kids are gone, the little boy at the orphanage apt. was still there. I was so excited to see his sweet smile when he got home from school today. He is one of the sweetest little boys I know. He can talk a little bit and communicate pretty well and is always so cheerful and happy. He laughs at everything. When one of the other kids throws his toys (which happens to be a lot), R will always go pick it up and bring it back to him and smile, even if he is right in the middle of something. Yesterday, because he didn’t go to school, he played all morning with me.
Today though, I had V and G this morning while the other boys went to school. I had one of the workers who is a bit more difficult. I try to talk to her and smile, but she never smiles. I don’t know if that’s just the way she is, or if she just doesn’t like me. She also is more stern with the kids. I can tell when she is there because the kids are rowdier and act up more than usual. Today, they would do everything they weren’t supposed to. V would grab clothes and put them in his mouth and suck on them so I kept having to take them away. I would try and distract him and we would play something else, but he would get up and get to the clothes. There was nowhere in the room I could hide them, so finally I just held the pile and tried to somewhat hide them under my arm. It’s hard to discipline him because I can’t tell how much he understands.
G was a bit rowdier too. He was sticking everything in his mouth or playing with wires and pipes in the room – all the things in the room he wasn’t supposed to do or play with.
I felt like I just had to run back and forth between the both of them taking things out of their mouths, moving them away from dangerous things, making sure they didn’t fight over toys…it was a long few hours.
Days like this are hard because I don’t feel like I accomplished anything or helped them out in anyway. I just have to hope tomorrow is a better day!
Then, tonight at the hospital, we walked in and the nurses pointed us to a boy named Claudio. We walked in to find the saddest little boy I had ever seen. He was just sitting there on the edge of the bed. When we started talking to him, he just looked at us with big sad eyes. We pulled out a ball and he started holding it and rolling it around. We tried playing with bubbles, playing with cars, blowing up balloons. He finally would throw the ball or balloon back to us, but no smile, no laugh, no emotion whatsoever for three hours. At the end of the three hours, we had to leave. We told him we would be there tomorrow. We have to take the big toys when we leave, so we pack things up a little at a time before we go so that it doesn’t seem like we just take everything all at once. We packed up the ball, and we continued to play with the balloon. Just as we were leaving, he got really sad again, sat on the edge of the bed and started to tear up. I noticed that he was looking for the ball and he kept saying “Minge” which means ball in Romanian. It made me so sad. I tried to console him and tell him we would be back tomorrow with the minge and he would be able to play again. I hated that we had to take it. I knew I could get another one, but in this hospital, when you leave anything, even if it is for one of the kids, most likely it will get stolen. I figured that if tomorrow he still loved that ball, I would just give it to him and buy another one somewhere.
It was so sad to see this little boy – sad as can be. Kala (who usually goes to the hospital with me) asked Mario where the kids go after they leave. We were under the impression that all of these kids were orphans. But, we found out that is not the case with all of them, Our little boy who rocks himself who I held for a while, has actually been abandoned, so when he gets better, he will go to an orphanage.
Mario told us that some of these kids actually do have mothers, but they are from an outside village or town and won’t come visit their kids in the hospital. How can you leave your child in a place like this – and not visit them or stay with them?
I think this was the case with Claudio. There was a dad with his daughter in the same room who told us in broken English that he (Claudio) had been crying for his mom all day.
September 24, 2010
Good news, R was there today (the boy from the orphanage who I thought was placed in foster care), so I’m not sure what happened the other day though. But our cute little Claudio wasn’t there today. I’m guessing he must have gone home? I hope he has a good mother who takes care of him, even if she doesn’t visit him.
Today at the Orphanage apt., the kids were completely different. One of the workers – Lily, is the sweetest lady ever. She is so kind and gentle with the kids. It’s amazing the difference in these kids depending on the worker. I know there’s an old saying “When Momma ain’t happy, nobody is happy.” So true – my parenting lesson I learned for the day.
The kids were so much more pleasant and easy going and I was able to play with them and teach them rather than constantly reprimanding them or getting them out of trouble.
V is coming along. Lily was helping me feed the kids bananas today. She was trying to have him pick up the food on his own, which wasn’t working. I told her he is still able to feed himself, as long as you pick up the food and put it in his hand. I think she was really surprised when I showed her the progress he has made.
D came home from school today and was so upset about something. He looked like he was on the verge of tears when he came in. I told him to come to me and he immediately came up and hugged me. I picked him up and just held him for a second and talked to him – until I heard a “Geseecka” –which is my name pronounced by the workers followed with a “Nu brati!”, basically meaning DON’T HOLD HIM.
I know that the workers know the kids better and they work with them on a daily basis all day, everyday…nonetheless, it is so hard to put a sad child down and have to look at them (not being able to communicate) and hope that they can read your facial expressions that say “I’m so sorry, I wish I could.”
G is as happy as a clam. I’m still trying to figure out what I can work on with him. He is a super smart kid and understands a lot of what is going on. He loves dogs, and every time he hears a dog bark outside, he stops what he is doing, gets a surprised look on his face, runs to the window and says “meow, meow!” It makes me laugh every time.
I finally taught him this last week the difference between a cat and a dog and I think he caught on. I also figured out from one of the workers that dogs don’t say “ruff ruff” here, nope, they say “hum, hum!” Ducks don’t go “quack, quack” either, they go “muck, muck!” So needless to say, G and I now know that when a dog barks, it means we both chime in “hum, hum!” really loud and run to the window. Gosh, I love this kid. I can’t get enough of the ticklefights and of his adorable laugh. I love everyday being greeted by his smile and laugh!
Almost everyday, the workers have fed me. They will fix something for me, and tell the kids to not bother me while I eat. They are very thoughtful. I hate that I can’t convey to them more than a simple “thank you” in Romanian. Sometimes I’m not exactly sure what it is I’m eating, and most of the time it is food I haven’t seen before, but I eat it anyways and have been pleasantly surprised.
Today though, Elena (the worker who always laughs so hard – and intimidates me a bit because she speaks a lot to me in Romanian, and I will tell her I don’t understand, and she will continue to speak to me, which I’m sure is probably entertaining for her!) – she gave me two pieces of this fudge/bread dessert, another piece of the regular bread with gelatin and chocolate chunks, a huge bowl of grapes and a banana. Then, about 2 hours later, she kept saying my name and telling me something. Finally, she said “Hai (Hi)!” which means “come”, so I went to the kitchen and she told me to sit down and pointed to this giant piece of bread covered in some blended mixture on top. A bit nervous at first, but I thought – I’ve gotta do it. I can’t offend them, especially when they are so gracious. So, I took a bite. I think it was some blended peppers and spices and a few other things? Okay, let’s be honest, I have no idea what it was. But, I ate every bit of it. It wasn’t too bad. It reminded me of vegetarian sloppy joes. (I’ve never had them, but that’s what it would have tasted like J).
I told her thanks and went to wash my plate. She told me to wait, even though it was time to go. She proceeded to give me two more pieces of the fudge bread in a little napkin, an apple and 2 big bunches of fresh grapes.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t look like I’m starving myself here. Maybe, she thinks I need to fatten up a bit? Either way, it is very kind of them. I feel like everyday I go – it’s like opening up one of the starburst mystery flavor candies – “What am I going to get today?”, hey, it’s character building, right?!
At the hospital – first let me tell you that elevators here are the scariest things I have ever been in. You are in a box about 4 ft x 4 ft wide, and they think you can fit 6 people into this tiny little space, where the entire time you are thinking that the whole personal “bubble” you have been taught about your whole life has now gone out the window. Hey, do you wanna be my friend, because currently you are smashed right into me! It’s also every man for himself. Rarely is there a “pardon” or “excuse me”, but rather a shove or a push to get out of the way. We waited twice for the elevator to the seventh floor. The second time, we were second in line to get in. As soon as the door opened, about 7 people came from behind and got in first. Before we knew what had happened, the doors were closing, and we found ourselves yet again, taking the stairs.
We went up today to our adorable little orphan boy. I'm going to name him Jacob - he looks like a Jacob. He is doing much better. He doesn’t rock himself as much, he is now smiling more often, and he finally doesn’t cry everytime you put him down. It makes me so happy to see the improvement these kids make even in a few days. Even though it is small, it’s worth something.
Here’s a quote that pretty much sums it up:
"Anyone looking into my diary expecting to find a day-by-day account of rescuing children would be stunned. it is, rather, a narrative of defeats, disappointments, unbelievable betrayals, discouragements, frustrations, obstacles, criticisms and weariness. scattered among those are the few successes that have made it all worthwhile.it has definitely been panning for gold: much effort expended and tons of sand processed to gain a few precious flakes.” - John Kachelmyer, Romanian Child Activist
When we got to the hospital and were with our little boy, we found 2 girls in the room. Corina – a 17 yr old girl was there because she had passed out in school the day before, and didn’t know why. Oh man, do I feel her pain. I knew exactly what that was like. Been there, done that. So, I told her we would come tomorrow even if it was a Saturday and bring her chocolate J. She was so excited to speak English to Americans. Thank goodness for her, we were able to teach 3 little girls how to play uno and Kala did magic tricks for one of the girls. They were loving it. We talked to Corina all about her life, about her school, about her boyfriend, etc. She was such a sweet girl. I think she was just glad to not be surrounded by kids with dirty diapers and little children.
Today was a good day. The best part, it’s Friday and it’s the weekend. Back home, the weekend meant hanging out with friends, bowling, swimming, relaxing, you name it. Here, the weekend means homework, cleaning, grocery shopping, laundry and keeping up on things. But, I wouldn’t trade being here for the world.
Sorry for the verbosity of this post. Here are some pictures from this week:
We had a few rainy days...which means GALOSHES! We sported these outfits to the hospital. We got plenty of stares :)
Our last day with Denisa. This is her singing with me. I miss this girl.
Sorry, had to get a snapshot of this. I pretended to hold up
Denisa while we got a pic of this beauty in the next room.
Claudio when we met him.
Nicoleeeena! I miss this girl so much. Don't worry, we thought she was a
boy the first time we met her too.
Blowing bubbles with cute boy Claudio.
Trying to blow more bubbles and make him smile. My attempt was not successful.
It's sad to see the conditions these kids have to live in.
Well, on to the next week. We have hit our three week mark already.
I can't believe how quickly time is flying.
Oh, and I made my first attempt at Romanian food again. This, my friends, is called Shaworma.
I know it doesn't look too appetizing, but it is delicious. Made with homemade french fries, cabbage/coleslaw mix, lettuce, pickles, tomatoes, chicken and some type of dressing. Sometimes, you can get it with hummus, cucumbers, onions...a beautiful thing :)
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